Thursday, July 31, 2014

Forward Ever, Backward Never

I don't know why I am up at almost 2 am posting to my blog! I did not turn on my computer for the day and just when I thought I could survive the entire day without it: duty calls, one thing led to another and wham! I'm hooked :( 

photo credit - pinterest.com
I got my car back on Saturday so I've been out for most of the day taking care of that. For some reason, I've been really tired lately so I came back home and slept....and slept some more...waking up even more tired only to respond to some urgent emails that could not be done on my phone.

I came on to say only a few things: I just love to write! I guess that is clear. No matter how tired I am, I always find the energy to write. I can go for hours without sleep even if I've had a full day out at work or play. 

A few hours ago and even on the drive home, I was filled with this tremendous desire to CREATE! Oh my! It's in my blood. Then I suddenly remembered something someone told me a few weeks ago: "once you have a talent, you will never be broke!" I so appreciate the people I've been meeting these past few years...I feel such an affinity and connectivity to some of them. They are like me in some ways and I feed off of their energy and I hope vice versa. 

It's funny, some people will tell you and others will just admire you from afar...until one day your paths cross or something happens and they tell you to your face. When that happens, it's an amazing feeling, because I can't even believe it myself. It's like: "What did I do?! I was just being me:)"

What we sometimes don't realize is that we each have a story to tell. Sometimes it is our shared experiences that draw us closer together. When we open up and tell our story without fear of judgement, we realize that we all connected and can assist in offering (sometimes silent) support and liberation not only as women or men, but to all living people under the sun. It does not matter our nationality, ethnicity or geography, we are all the same underneath it all. We all bleed, hurt, shed tears and yearn for acceptance and oneness with ourselves and others. 

I recently realized this even more so when I hosted a staff function last year. Despite our differences, whether we get along or not, our stories intersect and we find peace and joy to hear that others experience the same things. It was amazing to witness the attentiveness and openness of staff members with their innermost thoughts and very private moments. I had never done anything like that before and I came up with the concept for the function on the spur of the moment. It exceeded my expectations: it was beauty personified. 

It was in that moment that I made the decision that this is what I should be doing with my life. It was only 5 months into my contract and it was as though bells went off in my head. I went home and sat on my porch with this immense feeling of satisfaction and fulfilment (and a silly grin on my face) as I blogged about it and retold the experience and revelations to my Mom and close friends who always called to check up on me. I did not have a plan exactly figured out as yet, but I knew this was my destiny. 

There's only 3 things that make me happy: writing, music, genuine, kindred spirits and well 4: food and good wine! Err 5? lol. Driving used to be one of them, but I realized after my accident that my car is not invincible. I've been driving for almost 20 years (wow!) and it's been more or less incident free....because of this I felt insulated in my trusty, comfortable car, fooled into a false sense of protection which is now beginning to crumble and cause anxiety. 

I now realize even more so that driving is hit and miss. You can be the most careful driver and because of someone else's recklessness, your life can be over in the bat of an eye. A friend of mine was telling me today that he witnessed an accident just the day before when a garbage truck was given a bad drive and crossed the median killing a whole family. He saw the gory details of the victims' demise when the top of their car was obliterated by the truck. Sighh. 

This is really sad and does nothing for my nerves especially when I saw it on social media a while ago. Yesterday as I drove for the first time since my accident in pouring rain again, it was like deja vu. I was going really really slow and trembling on the inside. It was very traumatizing. As the days go by, I am regaining my confidence as I am told I am a very good driver and this is unlike me. It still fills me with fear: the uncertainty of the black carpet which we traverse daily.

Such is life. Like my Guardian Angel told me last week (the guy who assisted me after the accident): You have to develop some mantras in life: Never look back. "Forward ever, backward never" (Maurice Bishop - Grenadian politician). LEAVE the past where it is and ask God for guidance and protection. Trust Him and leave it up to Him to protect you.

Well said Kurt. I owe you my life. 

Until next time, be safe and remember to Make it Count. xo






Sunday, July 27, 2014

Lucky 36

Lucky 36. 

I expected fireworks and many 'light-bulb moments'...

I was wrong...it seems like it's just another day. Ahhh well.

In years gone by I lived it up and had a ball...celebrating at a restaurant or hotel...

photo credit - CK Correia all rights reserved Grafton Beach, Tobago
Last year I even had a 3-day celebration when I resided in the sister isle....which included Friday night drinks and dinner at Cafe Coco, a morning at the Face and Body Spa at the Magdalena Grand, a home cooked lunch at my place by my bro and girlfriend who came to visit.

This was followed by drinks and entertainment at Coco Reef Hotel where I got a special birthday rendition on the pan followed by Karaoke, more serenading and wine at Bago Bar in Pigeon Point! (I need to play "She's Just 16 years old/Into the Night" by Benny Mardones for old time's sake!--my friend just called and told me don't sing!) It all ended with an epic day at the beach with some co-workers, which unfortunately resulted in me stumping my toe on a rock and ending up at the Health Centre the next day! That didn't stop me from an encore when a friend took me to a belated birthday dinner the following Wednesday night before I went home for the long Emancipation Day weekend!

Yes...that was LAST year....

This year found me in solitary confinement (not really...just being melodramatic)....I spent most of the day at home with my family being pampered with a delicious breakfast and lunch. Nothing better than waking up to hot bakes and smoked herring! If you're West Indian or ever spent time vacationing in the Caribbean...you know this is a tradition...especially Bake and Shark at Maracas Bay, Trinidad. If you haven't tried it yet...it's a MUST! And ask for the special condiments: cucumber salsa, shadon beni, tamarind sauce and more...Makes your mouth water huh!

A friend of mine got me the book by T.D. Jakes: "Woman Thou Art Loosed" on Amazon as a birthday gift...so I started reading it on my kindle. Gave myself a mani and pedi while listening to my audio book, then headed off to church for the 5 pm mass. When I returned I had some wine and watched Joel Osteen on TBN....I'm having loads of fun in my 'old' age! But that made my day complete...He always speaks to my situation and I felt my concerns dissipate. I felt an immediate release.
searched for this wine everywhere since my first taste in Texas!

Last night I sat on my porch for the last time as 35 and recounted the many moments of the previous year...Yup...it was a glorious year...I don't regret a thing. My sister told me something interesting a few months ago....Hindsight is 20/20...

As the midnight hour rolled around, I believe I experienced a brief metamorphosis. It's so strange I felt all the things I was worried about over the past few months just seem irrelevant in the whole scheme of things. I wondered what I was fussing over in the first place...#TimeWasted

I've gained a lot of wisdom over the years and I am thankful for the people and events that helped me to get here. It's been a #Goodyear ! I hope God continues to show me favour in this my 36th year. I have Him to thank for life. After my ordeal last month, a couple of my friends said He has plans for me!


With that said, I will share with you my pearls of wisdom which is probably cliché but the difference is that I've learnt all these things on my own, the hard way...it's been a long journey and I am learning each day as I go along. Sometimes I need to take my own advice!


Let Go and Let God

Sometimes it's difficult to let go of people and familiar situations that once brought you a sense of peace, comfort or happiness. But I've learnt that not all that glitters is gold. Ask for the gift of discernment. Not everybody is for you or your 'friend.' As we say in trini: "not all skin teeth is smile." I've learnt that the hard way too. Apart from that, people change, life changes, sometimes they move on mentally long before the physical manifests itself. When this happens, you need to exit stage left. Self-preservation is of utmost importance and it pays off in the long run.


What you Give, is What you Get

I spoke about this in my first book. You can't expect to give off hostility and angst and get rewarded with peace and good fortune. Be good, do good and good will follow you. 


Be Present for the Present!

Before you know it, this moment is gone and then you would wish you savoured it more. That's all I have to say...you never know what you have till it's gone. The same is true for people and situations. Make the most of each and every moment or live with regret.


All is Fair in Love and War!

What is for you is you! Be patient, be discerning and watch it all unfold!
"For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning!" Psalm 30:50

Peace & Love my lovelies...

Until next time...

Remember:

30 is the new 20
50 is the new 40
and...
You're only as old as you feel!
You've got one life to life...make the most of it, make an impact and Live it UP!

That's all she wrote...and now the day is done!

Happy Birthday to ME :D

Cheers~

photo credit - CK Correia all rights reserved Grafton Beach, Tobago



Thursday, July 24, 2014

Saying Goodbye to the Old and Hello to the New

So it's a few days away from the big day and I am doing my do: My yearly round-up/pre-birthday blog. Admittedly it finds me in somewhat sombre spirits than normal, for which I can't quite put my finger on the exact cause. For starters I am without my vehicle going on 4 weeks!! Woosah. That's a long time for me who's always on the go. I have to rely on a driver to take me on my important runs and friends to drop off and pick up things for me. It's a sad state of affairs. But things could be worse. I thank God for life. I don't feel as though I've aged physically since my 20s but my scope on life has certainly expanded to fit my new image.

My close call

My friend Roxanne always chides that I always scratch the surface. I never really spoke
about that day in detail on the blog; but I am now in a place to do so. For those who are not close to me would not know that I was involved in a near fatal car accident in late June. This occurred when my car skidded off the highway in rainy weather. 

It spun around and slammed into the concrete median and was torn up pretty bad. Many persons said it could be due to the mixture of oil on the uneven surface of the wet road, as I was not going fast. Stopping to a halt in the middle of the road, other motorists could only pause for a few moments and then see how best they can proceed either to the front or rear of my vehicle which was now blocking traffic. Human beings never cease to amaze me. 

If it wasn't for the good Samaritan who was travelling behind me, I would have probably been a gonner. Originally from Belle Garden Tobago, this gentleman aka my Guardian Angel when he saw what was happening, blocked the traffic with his van preventing other cars who could not see further ahead from slamming into me. He came to my assistance afterwards as well and drove my car to the shoulder and called a tow truck while I waited in his vehicle. Another guy who was travelling on the opposite side of the carriageway jumped the median to see if I was okay, because he said his wife was getting ready to call the ambulance. It was that bad!

Meanwhile I couldn't wait to get out of the car, the radiator of which was now smoking. It was like a scene out of a really bad movie. Miraculously I escaped unscathed save for a few black and blue marks where the seatbelt held me and saved my life. For a brief 3 seconds I had already surrendered to the moment and gave up on my life as I thought that This. Was. It. 

With no time to pray and even say Lord help me or forgive me my sins, I just had a fleeting thought about my family and how they would deal with this when they found out. I was in a conscious state, yet unconscious. I lost all bearing of time and space until the car came to a halt smack dab in the middle of the highway *blocks eyes*. I later replayed this scene over and over again in my head for the next few nights.

I am glad that I say my prayers every day and night and the very night before I got on my knees (which I seldom do), to pray for my dad and everyone one else. I also prayed for God to help me to be a better person. In that moment, I believe He answered my prayers because if not, things could have easily taken a turn for the worse less than 24 hours later. It's so strange I got a premonition about this days before and I even took a different route that day, but you never know the day or time...it happened not the next day nor the day after that, but 5 days later.

Can't have my cake and eat it too
photo credit - CKCorreia Villas at Stonehaven, Tobago

I marvel at how my life has changed sooo much from last year and even the year before that. I had the perfect life living in paradise and answering to no one. 

Though it was not 100% perfect, looking back on it now, it was peaceful....blissful at times in many ways. I felt free as a bird. I was living in a bubble where nothing else mattered. But I needed to crawl out of my bubble sometime and this I did. 

Some parts I did not want to change and let go of, but this change was necessary for my growth and evolution. Am I happy with this change? This is a question I have been asking myself lately. Professionally yes. Personally not so much. So many good things have happened and some truly unpleasant, gut wrenching and shocking realizations. 

If I had prolonged the inevitable, I ask myself would I have been truly happy? Would I have been living in a false sense of pseudo happiness just waiting for the ball to drop so to speak? My mother always says: you can't have your cake and eat it too. Sacrifice is necessary. I know that I will regain that sense of peace and know what true bliss is one day. 

Saying goodbye to the old and hello to the new

As I turn this corner, I give thanks for another year. I say goodbye and thank you for a year of lessons, fun and happy times, sad times, new friends, people passing in and out of my life; revelations, goodbyes, even the tears and unpleasant memories. Most of all I give thanks for the messages: spoken and unspoken, the universal truths, the inspiration for a new direction and meaning for my life, the challenges for now I know how strong I really am. I welcome the new alliances and adventures, new people, strengthening of old relationships, new goals and dreams realized.

I thank God for my family blood related and not. They are the ones that give me strength and hope for another day when I can't see the rainbow over the horizon. They remove my rose coloured glasses and help me wake up and face reality and learn the harsh lessons of life. Those people who are not blood related are so precious to me. Their heartfelt concern and confidence in me makes my grey skies seem to fade with each new dawn. I mention them a few times in my new book. The past few months and weeks have been trying for more than one reason and even my family doesn't know.

Sometimes I wonder what I am doing all of this for and is it really gonna matter? Does it matter if I live or die? How do I tell apart the real from the fake? Would anybody remember or appreciate your contribution at the end of the day? Then I remember, it is my duty...as my friend Maxine and I declared over dinner many months ago: "there is no other way" I can't simply exist and go back to a ho hum life not ever realizing my full potential and purpose. As for making a difference...that's not for me to judge. When that time comes...I will know and feel it in my heart...The battle to determine who is really in your corner defeats me daily but such is life...

For now I keep ALL of these thoughts, memories, wishes and dreams sacred for I know one day they will find a release as I will get the resolution I need in order to move on in my head and heart.


Until next time...
See you on the flip side

Saturday, July 19, 2014

Learning to Cope with Alzheimer's Disease

I began this blog post tonight with the intention to talk about what it's like when someone close to you suffers with Alzheimer's disease; but as I typed descriptively, my feelings and experiences became so potent that I decided to share what I can at the moment.

With the knowledge of yesterday, I continue to practise living in the moment. I remember coming back home once a month to visit my family last year and seeing the gradual decline of my dad over the last 12 months...

We first started seeing signs late 2012, but did not fully understand what it was and foolishly ignored it, passing it off as old age. 

The earlier months of 2013 however were a stark contrast to the end of the year which seemed to decline rapidly. I spent a week home on sick leave in November, only to return a few weeks later in December and not find what I left just weeks before. I even received a call while at a Career Day a few weeks earlier that he tried to escape to come look for me. When I did come home, it was very dramatic when I had to return on the ferry a few days later. As a result, that November I experienced the worst case of sea sickness to date. This has since ceased (trying to escape) thank God.

Even in August, I remember coming home for the weekend and watching a football game with him one Saturday night. We were just having a casual conversation about my new job and my home away from home. Although some questions he would ask me repeatedly in the space of three days; like the fact that I was taking my car onto a boat to the sister isle and not a bus like he thought; what day and time I was leaving to go back, what exactly my job entailed and him wanting to come and stay with me for a few days. It broke my heart to tell him that he couldn't, since this would mean that he would be by himself during the day while I was at work. 

I did not understand what was happening and I think to myself now: if only I could have savoured those moments longer and had more patience, because his personality has changed so much since then. Now our conversations are diminished to a mere few sentences at a time with lots of prompting. I am super glad however that he did come to visit with my eldest sister and see where I worked and lived in January of that year.

Alzheimer's is not something one expects. It's not like you can predict this or see it coming a mile away. I would have never imagined this say 10 years ago. It can happen to anyone at any given time. My dad was always on the go: active, driving, very talkative and jovial always looking on the bright side of things, a solution finder and trying to help in any way he can, telling animated stories and the funniest jokes, doing some new DIY project around the house, cooking...he was the best cook! He cooked on a few occasions last year and my mom called while I was away to vividly tell me the story. My response to her was: I am sure it tasted good! And the reply was a resounding yes:) 

After retirement, he took me to work and back and also to the gym and university when I wasn't feeling well or too tired to drive myself through traffic. There was one time that stands out in my mind when I had the red eye (conjunctivitis) and he took me to school to drop off overdue library books. In those days he would park and wait for me for hours under the shade of a tree or take a walk, meet up with old friends and make new ones, until class or work was over. In this way a lot of my friends and co-workers got to know him and marvelled at how spoilt and lucky I was. He sure is a gem. Everyone certainly has their faults; but when I think about these times, I can see beyond the horizon and marvel at the BIG picture. I will cherish it in my mind always. 

This experience has prompted me to urge anyone reading this to savour the moments with their parents if they are still alive or anyone close to them for that matter, because you never know what the future brings. I can't even remember vividly what it was like before. I have the feelings and memories, but I can't recreate the intensity in my head. Sometimes I wonder if I am beginning to forget and would soon suffer the same fate! It's a sad thought, but it's a very real fear for anyone coping with a loved one who has the disease. 

One of my other good friends who lost both her parents and those close to her when she was quite young always gave me the above advice, but I am now seeing the value of what she was saying all those years ago. I too know how fragile life is as I could have lost mine some weeks ago for the second time, just shy of my birthday. I thank God for sparing my life that could have ended very tragic which would have been devastating for my family. I also give Him thanks and praise for what can only be described as nothing short of a miracle. It's a second chance to right the wrongs in my life, make a greater impact on the world around me, forget the useless thoughts that plague my mind and focus on the people and things that have demonstrated that they deserve a second thought and place in my life.

There is not one day that goes by that I don't tell my father how much I love him. I did this even before he got sick, but now more recently several times a day if I can. He always reciprocates sometimes by saying he loves all of his children...and sometimes he says that he loves me the most :) I love to hear him say anything at all and to smile or laugh. He tells me I always make him laugh. 

Right now he is my #1 love and the main reason I moved back to Trinidad. I don't regret a thing. I have definitely seen a positive change and improvement since I returned in January. Sacrifices and prayers are definitely worth the effort. I watch my sister and mom especially as they take care of and watch over him and it almost brings tears to my eyes as he has returned almost to a childlike state. I strongly believe that it is this outpouring of love that keeps him going and in good spirits.

As an entrepreneur I am flexible to take him and my mom on outings, read the bible and my books to him and spend quality time I could not have done before when I had a day job. I can do all this and still have time for my business. It's a win-win situation. His mood, communication and energy changes sometimes, but I always try to keep him talking and in good spirits. Today I played my completed audio book for him and every track he asks me who's talking on that CD! It was hilarious, his face would light up each time I said it was me.

Though I've adopted the approach over the past 7 years to see where my fingers lead me (as I never know what I'm gonna blog about until I begin to type) however I asked my sister earlier what she thought that I should talk about today and her reply was that I blog about the deepening of my relationship with our father. She told me that there is no shame in talking about Alzheimer's disease and it's something good that other people can perhaps relate and learn from, not to mention a release of my emotions. Good advice.

If this post has helped you in any way, or you or someone you know are also dealing with Alzheimer's disease, I would love to hear from you.

Until next time...

Peace & Love


Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Do You Have a Positive Mind?

I was undecided whether I should write a blog post tonight for fear that with modernizations in technology my emails/alerts will seem TOO MANY and a disturbance to those persons with whom I am connected :( But I guess I won the debate in my head :)

Today I blog about the power of intent and prayers. Yesterday I was feeling VERY anxious and tense about a situation and this morning bright and early, I received a very important phone call that awoke me from my slumber (and depression!). 

It immediately lifted my spirits and indeed it was what I had been waiting for over the past three weeks. I felt like I was walking on air all day which was a drastic and complete 360 improvement from yesterday. Another reason to give God thanks and praise!

Though I would not discuss the details right here and now in this blog tonight, I just had to share my testimony with the multitude that may think God does not exist or that prayers or faith is a waste of time. Indeed this verse rings true: "For His anger endureth but a moment, and in His favour is life; weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." [Psalms 5] 



Emotions and thoughts come in various shades, degrees and colours and one can only imagine what goes on in the minds of the 7.1 billion persons on this earth in 2014 during the 24 hours that comprise a day. Many of us prioritize "things" in our lives in various different neat compartments which sometimes displace and overshadow the ones that are of real importance. In order to stay afloat in a world that is constantly changing, one must have some belief system on which to rely in order to remain sane, positive and focussed. If not for this, it's so easy to be led astray by the negatives of this world. 

Your mind is very powerful and can harness great power depending on how you use it. A healthy mind is #1 and once you have completely mastered this, I strongly believe that it will attract health and abundance to your body and other things in your life. Trust me, I know of what I speak. Sometimes when I find myself slipping, I stop to regroup and channel my mind back into a positive place of strength, thanksgiving and peace...and even creativity as this is where I feel most at peace and buoyant. It's not always easy but it IS possible. 

I cannot impress my views on anyone or tell anybody how to live their life, but rather simply demonstrate how this has worked for me. If you have questions please ask by dropping me a line on the contact form on your right.

July is a special month for myself and many persons in my family. Today (now yesterday:) my parents celebrated their 51st Wedding Anniversary...At our toast earlier this evening on this year following their golden jubilee, I commended them for staying true to their commitment to each other "for better or worse." Many other thoughts on this, but it's admirable in this day and age and something to aspire to...


Peace to you...


Sunday, July 13, 2014

Can you Crush It?

Hey again....I just finished listening to "Crush It" by Gary Vaynerchuk for the second time in three years...Wow! I feel like I am now ready to really listen as I decided to follow my entrepreneurial dream this year. 

An old colleague gave me this audio book a few years ago and it was the best thing he could do for me at the time. This book is amazing for anyone interested in building their personal brand/business and leveraging themselves on social media as a SME (Subject Matter Expert) in their field.

Over the years and more recently, I've done quite a bit of research, subscribed to many video blogs, newsletters and such, but this author echoed a lot of my personal sentiments about my passion and drive and I'm glad to know that there are other people like me in the world. 

Many persons don't understand why I am up so late all these odds hours ALL the time for many years...even when I had my day jobs....but indeed it is fuelled by my abundant passion and love for what I do and I can't picture any other way to spend my time, that is, when I can tear myself away from my computer long enough to see the other side of life. (I've missed many gym days because of this! If it weren't for my friends I'd probably be 10 lbs heavier by now:)

Of course you must strike a balance because we all have to eat right?! In this book Gary Vee explained how to monetize your passion with real life examples, which I'm sure haven't changed much since the time of writing. I love how he makes it sound so super simple and within reach to the masses...well anyone who has access to a computer and a basic understanding of the internet. 

You can literally hear the excitement in his voice which makes you want to put it on pause and leap right to your computer and get cracking! Heck last night I spent hours redesigning my blog to incorporate all of these cool features and recommendations he speaks about in his book.

Prior to this I have noticed however that more traffic has been generated towards my blog and facebook page (even the older posts)...Although I have a few hunches, I'm not quite certain how this happened...But who's complaining?! In any event I'm super excited and elated for all of this new interest. 

Please feel free to hang around and find out more in my "about me" pages and subscribe to my weekly posts...oh and tell a family member or friend or two or three!!

Also feel free to email me (at inspirationescape@gmail.com) and let me know if there's an area that you would like me to discuss in my blog or what I can do for you!~

Hope this blog meets you in good spirits and you're still celebrating World Cup fever!

Till next time, have a great week and Remember to Make it Count!

Peace & Love,
Carolyn xo


Congrats to the Winners of FIFA World Cup 2014!

World Cup fever has come and gone :-(
As we bid adieu to a month well spent glued to our television sets...
We say congrats to the new winners of the 
2014 FIFA World Cup: 
 Germany!
In my mind, all the teams are winners because they tried their best. But hats off to the Germans for enduring to the end! 

Ich gratuliere!
See you in Russia for World Cup 2018!

Never a Dull Moment

You know there's rarely a dull moment in my world...I've just completely revamped my personal blog! #GottaLuvGoogle :-)

Every few years, I like to change things up so as to keep it exciting. I've redesigned the user interface and made it more user friendly by enhancing your experience with some cool new  features like:

Email subscriptions, 
About me pages, 
Most popular posts of all time, 
Blog archive, 
Live visitors feed, 
Page views counter, 
Links to my website and other pages,
Picasa photos,
Share buttons and various ways to interact...and so much more...

It's even easier on the eyes...Don't ya think?!

Feel free to stay a while and navigate your way around the site. While you're here you can sign up for my weekly updates/blog posts on the home page and of course feel free to share with your family and friends!

Happy Sunday!

Cheers~

Friday, July 11, 2014

Love or Something Like It: Part 2

Hullo...Tonight I share another excerpt from my first book - Thinking out Loud.

I've been editing Book #2 again last weekend...as I got myself an editor for the first 8 chapters. Will reveal who this mystery person is in time...Excitement! Still awaiting news from the publisher and hoping and praying for the best. I'm so excited with what this new book has to offer but I still have a few more weeks to play the waiting game. As I read it over and made some more (minor) revisions I can hardly wait for persons to read it as I share so much more this time around. 

For those of you that have been asking about it and wondering when...I have a special treat for you and I do hope that you enjoy...Thanks as always for your support. It means the world to me. I hope, I hope & I pray and pray...daily...habitually, steadfastly....so anxious. Fingers crossed. Wish me luck!!

For now, here's an article from Chapter 3: Family & Relationships. Love or Something Like It: Part 2...I closed my eyes tonight and picked it at random, as I scrolled and selected wherever my mouse stopped. I ask myself what do I know about the topic anyway...but many people told me that they can relate. I remember when I first wrote it in 2008, still on a crumpled piece of paper in coloured ink that I had been carrying around in my handbag for days....I was at my old office and some of the guys and women exclaimed as as they read the words on the page... since I seemed to be spot on. I watched excitedly as they were all smiles as their eyes lit up with surprise. I kid you not....those were some #FondMemories

I never attempted to publish it in the press however, but decided I had nothing to lose later by placing it in the book. A few weeks ago, it all came alive again in the studio. I had doubts as usual, but my producer said I sounded like Sarah Jessica Parker and should publish a book just on love! LOL....Well ummm....dunno about that! 

If you wish to hear it or read Love or Something Like It: Part 1 and the rest of this book...you can own your personal copy by purchasing it on Amazon. The paperback or kindle version is available via the following link: http://www.amazon.com/Thinking-Out-Loud-Carolyn-Correia/dp/1105184382 . Locally you can grab a copy at all locations of RIK or Metropolitan Booksellers (Capital Plaza, POS). Audio book coming soon.

As always I lovvve sharing with you...Without much further ado, here it is....Hope you enjoy!! :-)



Love or Something Like it –Part II

photo credit - www.kqed.org
Does anyone really know what love is? I think someone sang about that in the 80’s. But getting back to reality, the Oxford English dictionary 2008 published version’s definition of love is “an intense feeling of deep affection.” 

Does this summarize what most of us feel or have felt for that significant other at some point in our lives, or is it just scratching the surface? 

Do we ever really feel this undying love or affection or are we just going through the motions, trying to protect ourselves from any in-depth feeling, in the fear of baring our soul and leaving ourselves exposed, or worse yet “locked down” too soon?

Is this feeling fleeting and only experienced in a novel way at the beginning of a relationship or do we feel these emotions throughout our relationship or marriage? For married couples I think this is different, where both partners have grown accustomed to each other over time and have developed a respect or affection for the other, with the capacity to ignore the other’s flaws. 

Whether or not the same intense feeling of the emotion exists throughout the duration of the marriage varies from couple to couple, but in most healthy marriages, the feeling is always there but just expressed differently. Partners however, go through different phases even before they reach the stage of ‘happily ever after.’

The beginning ‘happy phase’

When your partner can do nothing wrong and everything is magical and mystical. Some would even worship the ground they walk on, doing anything for this person until that threshold of bliss comes to an end. At this point you do not acknowledge the person’s faults; in fact you don’t even notice that their foibles exist. 

The middle ‘getting-to-know you’ phase

As the days go by, little by little you begin to see this person’s imperfections. You are still willing to look past it as the good aspects still outweigh the rest and after all you’re not perfect either. The arguments are few and far between because you want to savour the happy moments so you avoid conflict and keep the peace. Instead you hold discussions with your girlfriends or brethren who have been there before and can perhaps offer some support and guidance in the right direction.

The love fights

At this point you begin to do things that each other notices as quirks. You’re not sure how you feel about these little character flaws—maybe an annoying laugh, the way they leave their things lying around, the nagging, or the fact that he doesn’t open the door for you anymore. You’re still not sure if you can live with these things on a long-term basis. You are beginning to have thoughts of the future and ‘happily ever after’. How soon these thoughts come into focus may differ depending on your gender and you may be wondering if it’s time to move on or settle. It may also cross your mind whether you can see yourself having offspring with this person.

Make-up or break-up

At this point it’s ‘do or die’—do you want to spend the rest of your life with this person or not? Can you live with the quirks? Can the quarrelling be quelled? Or is it time to ‘cut your losses’ and move on? It is important that couples sit and discuss this amicably and each partner knows exactly what they can and can’t deal with from the get-go. “You know it really bothers me when you do this…” So we don’t end up with smashed automobile windows and deflated tyres and sit around wondering why it happened in the first place.

Happily ever after’

I guess this is the part where the two people realize that they can’t live without each other, and that trip to the altar is nearing reality.  If it happens for the right reasons, it can be the happiest feeling in the world to have met your soul mate. For others it may be an escape, convenience, or a way of conforming to society, family traditions or influences. To stay true to this life-long, monogamous commitment is something of a rare occurrence these days, but once two people truly care, this will be the easiest challenge of them all.

      Whatever the feeling: love, like or adoration—respect and communication, are key to understanding the other person and maintaining sustained happiness. Relationships are hard work and are not for the flighty or faint-hearted. Those of us that truly care about the true meaning of love will think twice before using the word. It is not to be used lightly and abused for selfish reasons. 

    Whether you’re in love, once in love, or want to find love it’s important to look within and find out if you’re capable of not only giving love but also receiving love, for it only takes a moment to fall, but a lifetime to forget that one true love… or the one that got away.

 © Carolyn K. Correia 2011. All rights reserved.


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Thursday, July 10, 2014

A Labour of Love

I'm back after what seems like forever. But forever is too long when you're doing what you truly love. 

Can't believe another week has ended. Thank God for life!

I must first say that I am constantly in awe by the talent that abounds all around me. More on this in a minute...

Today was one of my final sessions at the studio as I wrap up the production of my audio book. I feel happy and proud of myself for all of my hard work. I started this journey in December 2012, but had to put the project on hold while I relocated to the sister isle for a year. 

I have since resumed the project on Good Friday of this year and revamped most of the book, adding new energy and passion for perfecting it into a labour of love. 

I'm amazed at how my artform has developed by leaps and bounds. I guess Tobago really did me some good! 

This book has really become something that is very dear and close to my heart since it brings to life the written word.

Time brings us wisdom through reflection and experience. Each year brings me one step closer to coming full circle to realizing my ambitions, my full potential and making a greater difference in the lives of others. 

It is important that we can 'step outside of ourselves' so to speak and see ourselves how others see us. When we do this, I believe that it shows true growth and maturity. We no longer have a myopic view of life, but we can see far beyond the reaches of 'self.' 

It is only then that we can attempt to work on our weaknesses and improve our lives and relationships with others. Of course others must want what you want in order to progress forward in a healthy way.

While I am reminded daily that there are so many superbly talented people everywhere, I am grateful for my own inspiration. Just to give a few examples: my producer played a music video for me the other day, for which he composed the music and wrote the lyrics of a song and I was in awe by this talent...

I learnt just today that there is a playwright living in the street next to mine...I read a script for a local film a few weeks ago in one night and it blew me away by the talent that exists in not only sweet T&T but the world over. And a friend of mine is about to publish her second business book...huge...

The internet is my muse and sometimes I lay awake thinking of all the things I'm missing out on while in bed! lol. I have subscriptions to numerous blogs and newsletters and I'm amazed at how some persons have full time jobs and families, yet find the time to do so much! Write blogs every day, articles every week and a plethora of other things...truly inspiring.

I have since shared clips from my audio book with a few friends and on social media and the reviews have been heart warming. The feeling is indescribable when you know that people appreciate your work and it helps them in some way. Heck when I listen or read some of my own words written in years gone by I can hardly believe that I wrote it..it is truly a gift...I inspire myself (now in my old age)! (joking)

Over the past few weeks and months (and even years), I always share my passion and market my products with whomever I meet. I guess it's part of being an entrepreneur. More recently people have asked me where my inspiration comes from and how I would describe myself. This is a topic I have exhausted in previous blogs, but for the newbies I will just say it is a gift from God. As I type this I do not have to even pause to think of what next to say. I thank the Lord every day for blessing me in spite of my imperfections for I know He is the only judge and always knows best. 

I am a born writer first and foremost...turned author and motivational speaker and finally communications consultant. I have stepped off of my ledge and though it's a process, I am confident that I am on the right path since many wonderous things are working in the background...some seen and some unseen. Some I can talk about openly and others I will wait for the right time.

I don't know what the future holds, but I sure do hope it's taking me to a place where the sky is the limit. I have infinite hope that dreams do come true. You can't lay down, make excuses and procrastinate and expect things to happen magically or feel perturbed that others are progressing. It's a lot of work and determination. Sometimes it is slow in coming but "the race is not to the swift...but he who endures to the end." Ecclesiastes 9:11

You must have the will to succeed and move ahead despite ALL the odds and it's all I know. Even if I fail I know it's not for lack of trying for I would have given it my best shot. But in this world, there are only two kinds of people: the dreamers and the do-ers. Sometimes it's one of the same person, but the difference is that the do-ers don't ever stop till it's done. And they are the ones that seldom fail.

Keep on doing you and Make it Count~


Peace & Love,
Carolyn