Would You Want A Second Chance?

It's one week away from Christmas and my mind is no where near the joyous celebration. Rather I am trying to tie up loose ends and keep my mind occupied. After my last blog, some readers were still confused, so to make things a little clearer...it's been weeks counting since the passing of my dear papa. 

Though I still haven't told many persons verbally, I hope you understand that I just don't have the words and fortitude to rehash and explain, as the memories of the last moments are already swirling thru and thru my head enough as it is. 

He did in fact have the most beautifully awesome service and 'send off' in style. Nothing but the best for my dear papa. And a few days later, we took a boat out and sprinkled his ashes in the ocean. It was only apt that his final resting place was where he lived and worked most of his life. 

The homily complemented my eulogy and what struck me the most is a few things the deacon said. He did not know my dad, but after listening to the eulogy he realized how way off he was in his prepared homily. He then spoke off the top of his head and captured the essence of the man known as my father as if he had known and grown up with him his whole life. 

He began his sermon by wondering aloud what he can do in the remaining years of his life to even measure up to my father. He said listening to all of the things he did, makes him want to go back and make up for some. He admitted that Daddy was after all human and not perfect, but listening to the vivid description of his deeds and what he sacrificed for his family was tantamount to the reflection of God Himself. 

As family members leave our childhood home one by one, I no longer feel the distraction of thoughts I once did and the memories are coming flooding back bit by bit. I no longer weep to myself, but I feel his presence with me...at least in my mind all the time. I often quote him in my everyday speech and constantly give reference to something he would have said or done throughout his life.

Although I knew this day would come, I feel as though he has just gone away and is coming back soon. It did not yet 'hit home' as it does not feel as though he is gone....I expect him to walk through the door at any moment. I feel connected in mind and spirit. I remember him toasting with us at home on Ole Year's, taking pictures and dancing to parang on television just last year..........Such is life. 

He lived a good life and had fully lived. No regrets. No second chances necessary. My recollection of that, along with my golden memories keeps the tears at bay....at least for now.

I must say thanks to all those who called and sent emails and texts, checking on me every day in some instances. I must reproduce this one in particular: 

"You've only lost the ability to see them physically. True love is really never ending...as some songs say and you will always feel that person near you. You did make the best decision (to move back home).... Family and life is more important than anything because they cannot be bought under any circumstances."

Thanks Kai. Bless your heart.

Peace & Love.

I Will Always Remember You

It's been a sad few weeks...So much has happened that it now feels like a dream. Surreal. But it happened. And the memories, good and bad...will live on in time forever as long as memory serves. 

My head is not in the right place to expound on the nature of my grief at the moment. However I would say this much: Life is short and unpredictable. We are all just ephemeral souls drifting through this life. Make the most of the one you have, so that there would be no regrets when all is said and done. 

Live life in such a way that you can confidently say when you have crossed over to eternal life and light, that you have fully lived, learnt, shared and loved. Material things are fleeting. To touch hearts, minds and souls is eternal. This will live on forever.

Tobago - January 2013

I've said this over the years in my writings without fully living and experiencing the range of emotions to bring my statements to life. 

The words which I wrote and spoke were not mine. It was inspired by God and influenced by my life's experiences and upbringing. Now more than ever I am thankful for my parents and what they have taught me and done for my siblings and I. 

Life is such that everybody is unique to internalize and rationalize things in a different way. Not everyone has the mental clarity, neutrality and ability/gift to do so. I am thankful that I can separate the truth from the untruth and extract the positive from almost every negative situation. I am also glad that my purpose is inextricably linked to this rationalization and gift.

You have made my life richer and happier in infinite ways. I hope you knew that at the end. I am grateful and happy beyond words that I made the right decisions and choices this year 2014 in particular to make your life more pleasant and make the most of our time together. I feel super blessed for the time that we shared. 

You said you will be proud of me regardless, but I feel it is my duty to continue to carry on your legacy. You have taught me so much in more ways than one. I will always remember you. The time we shared were indelible memories sealed with love that can never be forgotten.

May your soul RIP and may you sing and dance with your angels in the glorious kingdom (you know what I mean). Be my personal Guardian Angel and watch over me....till we meet again to spend an eternity of peace, love and happiness. I will LOVE YOU FOREVER.

A Glass of Wine Makes It All Better!

Happy 1st December, 2014 all!

Wishing you abundance and all dreams realized. It's not too late to Make it Count!

I found it useful to create a visual for how you would like your life to turn out. It's not always easy to block out the negative and keep focussed, but if we condition our minds and try to stay positive, the sky is the limit to our aspirations. 

I may not always exude a spirit of perfection....after all...I am human! Nor do I try to be perfect, but I do try to emulate and do introspection and meditation daily. I find that in those quiet moments, the pieces to life's puzzles come together and suddenly all is well with the world again:) I am graciously granted all the blessings I need to be comfortable and attract all the right people and situations. For this I am grateful.

Last week I had to deal with my family member being discharged from the hospital. It was not easy. All the strength that I previously exuded went out the window. Although I did not show it on the outside, I was crumbling on the inside. 

It was hard to see him in this vulnerable way. Previously made plans were shattered in a nanosecond and we were left with the full responsibility for care-giving. 

I did things that I was never trained to do. I overcame my sheer tendencies for squeamishness and daily luxuries I enjoyed like going out, exercise, work, sleeping in and food. 

Suddenly these things mattered little to me in the whole scheme of things. I found the inner strength to remain committed to the task at hand and persevered. I provided comfort and reassurance when me myself needed to be comforted and reassured. I surprised myself and surpassed my own expectations. 

Last night I said goodbye to an awful week and ushered in the month of December on a high note. I went to a meeting this morning and it was as business as usual. I received the magazine in print that I have been working on since June. The fruits of my labour were encouraging and gratifying to say the least. I feel accomplished and proud of my hard work and sleepless nights.

I did my errands, visited former co-workers who seemed so happy and proud of my efforts for the past year. Upon my return home, I executed my daily routine as caregiver. Afterwards I had a glass of wine to celebrate my progress for 2014 and success of the magazine. I feel content.

This month I will complete my second book and you will learn about it here, so stay tuned to this space.

Blessed be the month of December. May it bear abundant fruit, life, joy, peace and love.

Love and blessings always.

Making Your List, Checking It Twice: How To End The Year With A Bang

This article was first published on Elite Daily: Read it here: http://elitedaily.com/life/culture/making-list-checking-twice-end-year-bang/842742/

There’s one more month to go before Christmas and soon, we will be decorating our trees and ushering in a brand new year. But, before we start singing “Auld Lang Syne,” let us rewind and reflect on the past year.

Did you accomplish all of your goals? Did you fall short? Here are some of the items on my checklist that I hope you may find useful:

Did I stay true blue?

It’s important not to get sidetracked or deviate from your original goals, but it’s also important to stay open to the infinite unexpected possibilities that may await you in the future. Similar to a business, we must have some sort of a strategic plan for our lives.

Whether it happens every few years, annually, quarterly or monthly, it’s important to have a game plan. I do it annually and then mentally check back every few months to ensure that I’m on track. That’s my first step toward realizing my goals. 

Although things may not all happen at once, it’s important to have faith in the unknown and relinquish your attachment to the outcome. When we cling to one outcome rigidly, we close ourselves off to other opportunities that may present themselves along the way.

You may walk down the street on your way to the post office with that goal in mind, but you may also meet a friend who could deliver your package directly to its destination. The latter is only a possibility if you are able to engage that person in conversation and remain open.

If you remain rigid and unable to be flexible, you will never know what else is out there. 

Did I commit?

Sometimes, life gets so busy that we forget to follow through with our goals. In order to scratch off achievements on our to-do lists in life, we need to stay organized and dedicated enough to live up to the expectations we set for ourselves.

This past year was my first as an entrepreneur and I learned many things along the way. I executed some things according to plan and monitored them closely, while with other things, I started too late and failed to follow through. But, it’s all part of the exciting learning experience.

I am glad that there are people in my corner who were there to offer support and guidance. It’s important to first have a plan and create a system within your work space to regularly remind yourself what you need to do and when.

Did I set realistic goals and timelines?

Goals are important, but being practical is equally as important. When you rush in too soon or force something, most times, you will end up having to re-do it and in the process, you will expend twice the time and resources. And, you don’t want that!

So, to avoid the risk, do your research and assess your goals adequately. Give yourself breathing room for unexpected delays and setbacks. It’s important not to beat yourself up over the details, as hiccups are natural aspects of life.

You may also find it useful to solicit the help of a friend who is an expert in the requisite area or to get some professional help, like a coach or mentor.

Did I learn from my challenges?

For many years, we may have been doing things the same way, but expecting different results. Life is about learning; if something isn’t working, perhaps you need to change it up and do something different. Perhaps you need to have a backup plan, should things not work out by a particular time.

When you learn from your past, you will be able to chart a better future. I have found it useful and cathartic to blog. Suddenly, my thoughts and concerns focus themselves, as hindsight is often 20/20.

Did I give back to those in need?

“To whom much is given, much is expected.” This saying rings true for events in both business and personal lives. When we contribute our talents to good causes and return to others what we have received, we often reap the rewards tenfold, as doing so creates a cycle of reciprocity. Also, it feels great to give and great to know that someone else is better as a result.

Make your own checklist and end the year with a clean slate.

Book #2 Update

So I'm back -- 2 blogs in 2 days...Whew! I'm following the advice of someone I met at my networking shindig on Friday--which is to blog everyday. My friend Nigel and another IT pro told me this years ago when I was launching my first book. I did it for a while then went back to my old ways. 

Nigel even gave me the audio book Crush It by Gary V and again I digressed. But Bernadette convinced me to get back on track. I know this is important especially since I'd be launching my new book soon, as my friend advised the first time around. The question now is how to monetize my blog and get more hits among other things.

photo credit - C.K. Correia All rights reserved 2014
Botanical Gardens, Dallas Texas

Speaking of books...I received the second draft for the cover design of my new book last week and was thrilled at the progress...Just a few more changes, then I would be good to go. I have one more chapter to write along with the epilogue, then off it goes to get an affidavits then edited. 

My designer and editor are one of the same person with a plethora of other credits to her name. I'm super excited to be working with her and always so pleased and satisfied after each of our Skype meetings. 

Last night I wrote my bio and book synopsis to be placed on the back cover. I read it for my family during our hospital visit today and everyone loved it. My friend and marketing guru Yohann also shared his excitement and had this to say: "I love it Carolyn...Love your writing style...simple and real...no forced extravagance in your structure and wording." 

Luckily I had professional headshots taken last September 2013, so that's one less thing to worry about. I must send some love to a few friends who I bombarded via email and whatsapp this week while deciding on the best shot for this and the cover design (Ashley...we can still work out your commission when it hits the NY times bestseller list! lol)

I must also say a Big thank you to all those persons who proofread for content way back in the early stages when the vision for this book was not even yet fully formed. Also thanks to the last two kind souls who willingly accepted the challenge despite their demanding schedules. Your efforts are immensely appreciated.

The next few weeks are going to be super busy as I prepare for the new year and tie up loose ends for this one. But first I am going to be still and soak in all that has happened in 2014 and give thanks for my blessings great and small. Like my mother always said to me as a child: "Carolyn, Rome wasn't built in a day." 

When I receive messages, emails and phone calls from friends, acquaintances, associates and some mere strangers telling me I've done a lot and doing great things...it warms my heart because I don't even realize it myself at times. I just keep going, stay open and make the most of opportunities when they come. Their words gives me hope and spurs me on to reach my destination....and I know "I'll get there when I can!"

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Peace & Love

A Night of Networking and Fun!

Last evening I attended Network 4 NetWorth 2 at the President's box at the Queen's Park Oval. The event was hosted by the Nova Committee of the Trinidad & Tobago Chamber of Industry & Commerce of which I am a member of the latter. 

It was an evening of new connections, like-minds, lots of ideas, good conversation, scrumptious hors d'oeuvres and a fully stocked bar. I'm having a hard time deciding which one I enjoyed the most...lol...Just kidding...the purpose of the event was fulfilled and well executed in my opinion. I have no complaints and I can't wait for the next one.

I have attended other networking events in the past and even proposed to host my own at a couple organizations of which I am/was affiliated, so this was a great experience for me. Most if not all of the persons were new to me, so I worked my way around the room trying to get to know a bit more about everyone and also share what I do. Some were even interested in my business and me theirs. 

I did not know what to expect at this particular event, so in lieu of business cards, I printed flyers for my book and business. Each business was supposed to be paired with other companies that can benefit from each other. Though I never met my partners (not sure if they showed up), I am satisfied with the result.

This weekend I will be planting seeds and see what springs root. I am excited and thrilled by the idea of possibly working with so many SME's and inspirational business owners and assisting to bring their dreams to life while exercising my own creative talents. 

I got some advice about blogging in general and others are reviewing my sites and assisting me with info on how to get over the hurdles of placing my audio book online. I met someone whose business involved the delivery of fresh produce to your door...Market Movers Ltd...and you can even order online! Did not even know this existed in Trinidad. Amazing. I met those who are involved in the manufacture of soaps and some who are in the same field as myself. 

I'm excited and can't wait to start putting these ideas into practice and reaching out. Hopefully photos to follow soon!

Cheers~

If you stumbled along my page, you can connect by dropping me a line on the contact form on your right or emailing inspirationescape@gmail.com or get updates via facebook at https://www.facebook.com/ThinkingoutLoudbyCarolynCorreia or twitter @lyncorr. To learn more about what I do, you can also visit http://www.hicomegaconsulting.com/

My 12 Minutes of Fame

So many great things happening this week.

On Tuesday I attended my friend Maxine Attong's book launch. I saw her dreams turn to reality as she put to bed her "head book" Change or Die and ushered in her passion, pride and joy which she calls her "heart book" --Lead Your Team To Win. I listened to her eloquently bare her soul in some instances and express what the publication of this book meant to her and the long journey which led to this moment. As I listened, I couldn't help but find some similarities in my own work/life/passion experiences and what led me to write my second book. 

What struck me during the guest speaker's speech (Keston Nancoo) as he drew reference to Maxine's book, was when he said as a leader you must listen impassibly...from the frame of reference of the person speaking. You must give the other person the opportunity to be heard. He said that at times most persons in leadership positions walk around like they are the boss while others don't view them as such based on their behaviour. 

The author's own experiences and metamorphosis as a successful leader brings home the points made in the book. This makes it very real and personable which is very attractive to me as a reader. As a former HR professional and now business owner I can't wait to purchase my copy on kindle!

My 12 Minutes of Fame

Also on Tuesday I received a text from a friend to appear on a local TV talk show called D Lunch Room on Synergy. He asked me to come on the show to promote my newly launched audio book of Thinking out Loud. 

This is something I always shy-ed away from for whatever odd and subjective reason...even when the bookstore offered to set up radio and TV appearances for me back in 2011.

This was the biggest mistake I ever made since I don't know what I was afraid of in the first place! I almost turned it down and recommended Maxine to go on the show! LOL. My friends knocked some sense into me though. My sister and another friend watched it and they said I was awesome! I felt like I could talk all day...I answered even the most difficult, personal questions or successfully and eloquently dodged it and steered the conversation in another direction! lol...I surprised myself and I think I'm  now hooked...on to the next! Big thanks to all those who had confidence and supported me.

From my lips to God's ears

The good news doesn't end there...for the persons who have been following my blog...my loved one of whom I spoke of earlier is being discharged from the hospital soon and I found a nurse to do house calls last night. Yes indeed I must say again that GOD IS GREAT!

Peace & Love

ps I also got the preliminary cover design of my new book...it looks fabulous and I can't wait! So far everyone loves it...The excitement is building...and the countdown to publication is on!

I've Been Down That Road Before And This Is What I've Learnt

I am often reminded that life is unpredictable as the rain and things can change in the bat of an eye. So much has happened since my last blog on Tuesday. While I can't divulge the details at the moment, I can share my feelings and what I've learnt. 

Someone very near and dear to me has become very sick over the last few days and well months. It's not something someone can foretell. I don't even think the gravity of the situation has hit me as yet. I feel strong on the inside and I carry this on the outside knowing in my heart that everything will be okay. And as I just told my mom, I've prepared myself for the worst so once I accept that, I am prepared to deal with anything. 

During my overnight stays and 12 hour visits at the hospital, I realized the enormous capacity for love and selflessness I really have inside. It suddenly came flooding back like snapshots from a camera through my mind's eye, all the times this person was there for me when I was ill or wasn't myself. I still remember and these memories are golden and I always feel soo connected in mind, body and spirit. 

photo credit - C.K. Correia 2014 All rights reserved
Chaguaramas Board Walk - Trinidad

When I held his hand the other night, I could feel his energy radiating through my body and even felt some currents of pain. I asked God in that moment to take away his pain and transfer it to me, as I would do anything in the world to make him feel better.

Tonight as I returned home with my family, I asked myself how come I don't feel sadness and appear to be so strong under pressure when everyone else seems to be crumbling. I provide comfort to others and words of inspiration as though I am bionic woman and I am baffled by the conundrum. 

Then I turned on the television and listened to a popular preacher who said something that resonated with me. He said that the valley/darkness had given me the strength and prepared me for this  moment. This could have some truth, but could it be the total explanation? Or have I just been through so much that I have become numb?!

What I've Learnt

This much I know: We go through so much during our lifetime, that it is easy for our heart to become blocked. Whether it is a loss through death, divorce, break-up, disappointment, job or reversal of fortunes, it is important to ask ourselves how this situation has changed us. 

photo credit - C.K. Correia 2014 All rights reserved
Chaguaramas Board Walk - Trinidad

We may never learn the reasons why, but what did we learn about ourselves and what can we do differently next time around? Did we learn kindness, forgiveness, patience, strength, discernment or acceptance? Are we better for the experience(s)? 

Is it a message to become all of these things; perhaps change our life or some deeper message to help others with their own?

I am still searching for some of my answers to which only God has the pieces to this puzzle. However, if we have patience and listen when He speaks to us, we would finally "find our peace," let go and open our hearts again. Sometimes he speaks to us through other people, dreams, situations or by listening to our heart.

Today I practice acceptance, patience and forgiveness as I release my burdens, brokenness and  intentions onto the Father and wait on the answers. I don't know what the future holds, but I keep steadfast in faith and resolute confidence that my prayers will be answered.

For more, please join me on my journey>>https://www.facebook.com/ThinkingoutLoudbyCarolynCorreia

Take That Stroll With Me Down Memory Lane

I will attempt a short blog tonight. I think I'm getting the hang of brevity.

Over the past few days I have been taking it easy...a much needed time out after burning the candle on both ends with late nights/mornings at my computer trying to perfect everything and cross off things on my to-do list for 2014. Have I succeeded? No. There's always something to be done and accomplish. As I say in my workshops: There is always more. The moment you think you've done it all, is the moment you stop living.

Yes so I've been sleeping...a lot...Did I mention that already? :) It seems my body is more

photo credit - C.K.Correia 2014 All rights reserved
Fort George, Scarborough Tobago

tired than I thought. I could not even make it to the gym today. As I have neglected my exercise routine for many months, what's one more day right? 

I've also been watching more television than usual. Usually just the BBC. But a moment ago I watched a portion of a re-run of Scandal and I remember seeing it while I lived on the sister-isle of Tobago last year... 

My mind works in such strange ways from ever since I can remember. My thoughts took me back to another time and place so different: the feelings, goals, experiences...But most of all the independence and my mental state almost a year ago. I began to get nostalgic. It feels like a lifetime ago, yet the thoughts are so potent and fresh as if it was just yesterday. I felt as though I was teleported thru time back to those moments and feelings. Ahh life!

Have you ever experienced how amazing it is when a song, a word, a movie or photo takes you back to another time? Sometimes to a place that you treasured or maybe something negative that you can transform and learn from. It's not living in the past, but the choice is ours what we do with those memories and how long and often we choose to replay it in our minds. I was talking to my uncle who lives in Canada via Skype on Sunday night about the same thing. (Skype by the way is so amazing...I've been using it even more this year for business meetings and to connect with friends and family in various parts of the globe). As I played and sang along to some oldies on my computer to him, shared articles and discussed life...I felt as though I just created a memory of that moment. 

Memories are such that some persons may feel the same way in the moment and then that's it...the moment is forgotten. Sometimes the memory is so strong that all parties will cherish them forever. Other times the memory is just another event and not strong enough to qualify for remembrance for either party. And yet other times we want to bury those memories because we are afraid to confront the feelings it presents to us. 

Life is so complex and I'm not sure I'm qualified to unravel the meaning. Each person processes things in different ways which is what gives our experiences meaning and uniqueness. It's how we deal with them that matters.

Live a little, Love a LOT...Make each moment Count.

Peace & Love.

Can you relate? Please post a comment or follow my journey by connecting with me on facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ThinkingoutLoudbyCarolynCorreia