I was carrying out my usual duties as Editor of a local HR magazine when a line from my book Thinking out Loud stuck in my head. And so I was inspired to share with you an excerpt.
This article was inspired by a workplace incident. It is
different from the others as it is a bit of a rant. Many people have told me
they could identify. It is meant to create awareness and allow people on both
ends of the spectrum to be cognizant of their behaviour or heal their hearts in
order to offer forgiveness.
The world has
relied on the grapevine for news and information for so long that people often
forget what integrity and honesty stand for. Often times we see others
engaging in idle chatter, which inevitably is to the detriment of someone else.
You never know where and when the rumour started but before you know it, it’s
spreading like wildfire and considered the talk of the town and gossip. Too
many times things like this originate from pettiness, idleness, and jealousy.
If everyone was to concentrate on giving their all to a particular task, life
would not be about what the neighbour is doing or, in some cases, not doing.
We see it in
offices, schools, associations, even in church. Individuals need to realize
that backbiting and infighting serves no purpose and it does not make them a bigger
or better person to have borne false witness against someone else. From time
immemorial it has been like this. When will it end? Does it solve anything? I
affirm that it doesn’t. Perhaps it takes place out of fear or insecurity.
Possibly wanting something another person has…but trying to get it by
slandering the person’s name is not the way to go about getting it.
What you should
focus on is trying to have a good aura so that people will want to surround
you. If you give off hostility and pettiness, that’s what you will attract. If
you routinely attract negative people and adverse situations, you have to step
back and wonder if it’s something that you
are doing wrong. And at the end of the day, you have to live with yourself
for having to tear someone else down.
Really, there are only two people who
know the truth: you and the one you have wronged. Ultimately, you are the one
who stands to lose the most. The other person is being true to themselves by
being the bigger person for having let bygones be bygones and not sinking to
the depths of anyone else’s transgressions. Only time will tell what a guilty
conscience can live with. And of course karma eventually catches up with you.
At the end of the day, you have to answer for all of your indiscretions and not
a soul will be there to support you.
Sometimes
feelings entrap you and you are dumbfounded by the folly of human beings but
when you look at it through a different lens you can’t help but feel sorry for
individuals who resort to this kind of idleness. Some people hate to see anyone
else grow and develop. When things seem too good in your life, others may feel
the need to bring you down to their level. The possibility also exists they
themselves would like to do better but for whatever reason they can’t, and your
presence reminds them of this.
Another reason could be that they have worked
very hard to get where they are and they feel as though you’ve acquired your
successes too easily. In still other instances, individuals are just plain
selfish and competitive and don’t like to see anyone surpass their level of
success. It makes them feel less accomplished to see someone else with the same
thing or going for more, for they are reminded that there is something else out
there greater to do and accomplish.
Whatever the
reason, individuals need to let go of pettiness and live unattached to
materialistic sources. Yes, a competitive spirit is good in small doses as with
everything else but sometimes you just have to know when to quit for it does
not make you a better man—or woman.
“I returned, and saw under the
sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither
yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour
to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all.” –Ecclesiastes 9:11
You can own your copy of my book Thinking out Loud on paperback or kindle via Amazon or Lulu. http://www.amazon.com/Thinking-Out-Loud-Carolyn-Correia/dp/1105184382
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