Sun Is Shining, Weather Is Sweet!

Happy Sunday ALL! Hope this day meets you in fine spirits. I was feeling a bit down (missing my Dad) then woke/got up, went outside and realized that the "Sun is shining, weather is sweet" (today:) and I'm ALIVE! There's LOTS to be thankful for. 

Sad days are expected every now and then, but we should not let the feelings linger too long...I know I needed to pull myself together when a friend whatsapp'd me and made me think of how much more fun awaits in life. After hearing a couple of your 'weather reports' I was reminded of how much I wanted to travel the world in my lifetime...

So far I've only been to #England, Grenada, Northern California/San Francisco/San Jose/Santa Clara etc, New York/Jersey and Texas...There's no place like home though and I'm counting down the days when I'm back on the sister isle of sweet #Tobago grin emoticon

Where have you visited? And what are some of your burning desires which you hope to do in your #lifetime?! I would love to hear from YOU!

 — feeling positive

Reunion Tower, Dallas Texas

Tower Bridge, London

Gouyave, Grenada

Is It Okay To Be Your Only Fan?!

Tonight I am having a glass of wine in celebration of all my hard work this past week. It was long in coming. I kept saying I must make time to celebrate but I haven't. Sometimes a "time-out" is necessary to reward ourselves for a job well done. Well, "good" is a relative concept, but once we are happy with ourselves that's the first step. Confidence is important.

That brings me to another point. Is it okay to work in a capsule where you are your only fan?! Sometimes I write something and re-read it a gazillion times because I am so pleased, then someone else may not get the same feeling about it! Has this ever happened to you and what do you do about it?

Hmmm. 

After careful thought, I think that when it comes to certain things like writing, singing, cooking...which is better enjoyed by other people, we must aim to please. I don't write for myself, nor do I buy my own books and CDs. Therefore I must ensure that I listen to the feedback and concerns of my readers and listeners. If I don't do this, then my work is in vain.

At the same time, if you listen to too many opinions, you lose your sense of identity. You get swept away by what other people think and your sense of self diminishes. You lose confidence and self-worth and eventually your drive and passion would diminish.

We don't want that! So whatever you love to do, ensure that you strike a healthy balance.

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Peace & Love

You May Never Be Perfect, But That's OK

Today is Friday. It was a good day. A sad day for some. An ordinary day for most. For me it was just average, but I am thankful. Most times we don't look at our days in the grand scheme of things, but I realize I ought to do this more often.

photo credit - C.K. Correia all rights reserved 2014
Pigeon Point Beach, Tobago

I am at mental place where I am still establishing my footing as an entrepreneur and I realize that I have lots to learn yet. 

I am glad for the fantastic network of friends and colleagues who are always there to lend support whenever I need it. 

As I revisited my second book with the suggested edits from my editor, I realized that my story is ever changing. This is because I am changing. I am constantly growing and my evolution is part of living. If you don't change, there's no growth.

While I feel there's still so much more to learn and adapt to, I remain aware of my actions and shortcomings. Sometimes it's so hard to adapt to things in your environment, because every time you say you will do X, Y gets in the way. It's as though the devil tries his darnest to see you falter! How many of you feel this way?

But yet I fight. I try. I fail. I get up again and try and try until I succeed. It's a continuous journey. After several baby steps, one day you may be astonished to discover that while you weren't paying attention, you've taken a giant leap in the right direction. 

One thing I bear in mind: We are all human and none of us are perfect. Perfection is an illusion. It's like trying to catch your own shadow. It will never happen...no matter how hard you try.

So go easy on yourself. Give yourself a break. I remain conscious of myself and my journey. I am very aware of the things I need to work on, but I take it one step at a time. That's life. I may never get it completely right, but as long as I keep trying, in time I may get close enough to put my mind at ease. And that's all that matters in the grand scheme of things. 

Have a great weekend all! Remember to Make it Count!

Peace & Love

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I Did It My Way

Conditioning the mind is so important to constructive thought. Whenever I think I can't, I tell myself "I can" and focus my mind with all my might on the task ahead. Sometimes it's not easy, as there are lots of variables to deal with on a daily basis, but it is very possible.

I felt pulled in so many different directions for the past couple weeks trying to tie up loose ends and get things done. In the process I forgot that my mind also needed a break. I've been working on getting my body back up to its usual fitness levels and forgot to take time out to meditate and just be. I think my meditation class put me back into this mode.

I know there are lots of things I have to work on still, as I realize I still allow petty things to anger me. But you know what? When you realize that God is in control, you just wait on Him to do His work. There's nothing you can do, but pray and sit and wait. He will deal with things in His own time and He is always on time.

Right now, my focus is to manage my time wisely and cautiously and choose the people I allow to get close to me. Through my meditation I will ask for the gift of discernment since I am still learning that all that glitters is not gold. I was just telling my agent that today. It's like a rude awakening the lengths people go to hide who they really are.

Today I edited my friend's Dad eulogy and tomorrow I deliver. Her words made me YouTube Ol Blue Eyes (Frank Sinatra). I had a good cry to get it out of my system. Although I did not know her Dad, I feel her pain. I cried for her Dad, my Dad and even Frank Sinatra as he sung "My Way"! I got lost in time to a period in history long ago. 

Tonight I also completed a project that I was working on and I am pleased and proud of the result. Now I wait to see how I feel about it, then submit and wait some more for feedback from the client.

Today I did it my way and I love how it feels.

Cheers~

What My First Meditation Class Taught Me

On Monday night I attended a meditation class. My first. It was cool. Except I reached a few minutes late and walked around the building a few times trying to get an entry point! The doors were all locked. I heard persons speaking in tongues and decided to knock on the door. Finally someone told me it was upstairs only to get turned away by my fear of entering a dark, empty room. Drat! It was the right venue, but see what fear and silence does?!

Yikes. So after a few more trips down the stairs then up again, I finally "found my way". Hurray! So I missed the initial "talk" and I basically sat there in silence with my own thoughts for a good 15-20 minutes. What did I do? 

I reflected on what transpired just before I got there. My neighbour blocked my driveway (yet again for the millionth time over the past few years) so I had to honk on my horn with all my might at that hour of the night. Hence me being late. Sigh. Now you see part of my reason for moving to Tobago?! lol. I felt my anger subside.

I reflected on my business/company and all the meetings and feedback I have been receiving thus far for the year. I reflected on my book and my editor's comments and all the work I have to do still. I thought about my car insurance premium that I had to pay this week! 

I thought about balancing all the things in my now packed schedule and how exciting it all is. I said a silent prayer for my Dad and released. I thought about my friend who also lost her Dad this past week. I thought about everyone who was going through a loss and how they are coping. I prayed for my Mom to come to terms with her loss.

I looked around and wondered what the other persons in the group were reflecting on....then I returned to my centre. I heard the bell chime very low three times, meanwhile following the lit candle and the red light on the CD player all the while. The most beautiful serene music came on which I thought was Latin, but later found out was really English. It reminded my of the Ave Maria I played at my Dad's funeral. I felt a peace wash over me...thru and thru.

Indeed it was interesting. I exchanged greetings with the host who invited me and apologized for my tardiness. I learnt that once you let go of your fear you can get to the church on time! lol. No just kidding, I learnt that when we overcome our fears, what seemed crippling, can actually be the key to finding our peace, letting go of those troubling thoughts and embracing the unknown to achieve what can be viewed as safety and wholeness.

I look forward to next week's session. I will be on time this time. I plan to get there a half hour before and listen to "the talk". I also plan to meditate some more about my neighbour. Some things never change. 

Divine Order

Peace & Love

Momma Said There Would Be Days Like This

There are so many things to be grateful for, yet we are human.

I've discovered that it's okay to have an off day...to not be barrels of fun and just lay low. My turn was today. Although I was busy going to meetings and getting things done, in those quiet moments I felt an unease. I felt it as I awoke this morning and the feeling lingered even as I worked out at the gym. I think it's partly because I feel for my Mom who is still coming to terms with my father's death.

I try my best to reassure and comfort her daily, but her memories and emotions run deeper than I thought. Tonight I listened to her tell stories of when she and my Dad were young and in love and it kinda made me sad too! But I must pull myself together since I am helping a friend with the eulogy for her Dad and reading it on her behalf at his funeral this week.

I was so dry-eyed when I did it for my own father that I think I should be okay. Maybe this will be part of my healing process. Anything for a sister (in Christ). I will be okay.

Tomorrow is another day and baby steps is all it takes. 

Divine Order.

Peace & Love

I am in it for Life!

Sunday is a rest day for most people and it was for me. Although I set out to work on various projects today, sad to say I did not get much done. I cooked and tied up some loose ends.

My day started out with some old friends that came to the house to do some business. It was refreshing in so many ways to catch up and really listen to each other. I am very happy for having stayed in contact with so many joyful and genuinely wonderful people.

Speaking of which, I met the most beautiful little soul today as well. He is just 3 years old and his name is Jadon. I think I am in love with this little guy! He is my friends' son. Although I don't want any kids of my own, my heart turns to marshmallows whenever I am around them or see photos (mostly the little ones, especially babies). 

I love kids but God knows what He does. I don't think I have the fortitude for the long haul. Maybe one day I will adopt but for now, I'll just cuddle and admire from afar! 

Children are a full time job that never stops, not even at 18. So once you decide to take on this responsibility, you must be in it with your whole heart. Your actions can affect another person for the rest of their life!

For now, my baby is writing. And I am in it for life!

Stay tuned as we journey together.

Peace & Love

Change Your Perspective, Change Your Life

Perspective changes everything.

A new window was installed in my room yesterday and what a difference it makes. The old window was rarely opened as it was in a peculiar place. This new positioning made me value the importance of fresh air and light. It also brought a new energy to the room and how I felt being in it. It made me wonder how I survived without it for so long and how persons in solitary confinement feels. 

photo credit - C. K. Correia 2014 all rights reserved
Caroni Swamp, Trinidad

Today I also visited a friend who lives on the other end of the island. This is far for me, as I am sometimes fearful of driving long distances by myself especially at night. 

I've done it countless times, but I now realize it is a mental thing. Once you get behind the wheel, it is like second nature. It was refreshing to clear my head and reflect on the drive home all by my lonesome.

As my friend and I reminisced about old times and made toasts for our plans for 2015, I was reminded of what great people I have in my life. 

My friend (who was a stranger at the time) allowed me the opportunity for a promotion/transition 8 years ago, which catapulted my career in a new direction. It wasn't the career path I planned, but it turned out even better. 

As a result, I met great people who became friends, developed personally and professionally, overcame my fears of public speaking and so much more. Of course one of the many benefits was the ability to enjoy a lifestyle which paved the way for my future ambitions. 

These things all prepared me for the many moments and experiences that followed. It took me to the next level of my journey, although I didn't realize it at the time.

Although we don't see each other often, I know the bond is still there because when we are together we're like dynamite! They say laughter is the best medicine and if that's true we're both cured of all ills :)

Today I am grateful for everything seen and unseen, because I know there's a Higher power working in the background and aligning all things in my favour.

How many friends do you have like that and what are you grateful for today? 

Change you perspective, change your life.

Have a great weekend and Remember to Make it Count!

Peace & Love

Joy Cometh in the Morning

I just realized that I dawdled so much that I only have half an hour to blog tonight. I will try to make it quick before the midnight hour and my blog date changes to Saturday.

Tonight my Mom, sister and I had some barbadine and soursop ice-cream to commemorate my Dad. For the non-natives, these are tropical fruits found in the Caribbean...it's sweet and fleshy and can be juiced to make punches or ice-cream by removing the seeds and adding sugar and milk. 

I so desperately wanted to get it for him before he passed, but I kept procrastinating. I kept making promises but I was just too busy hustling from one thing to the next that I had forgotten to make time to do this. Every now and then this memory gnawed away at my mind for a while...But am I sad? No. But I should be. I have dealt with it...at least for now.

How many of us beat ourselves up for something we did or didn't do only to realize that everything is as it should be. We can't change what's past but we can do things differently going forward. 

We can acknowledge the other good things that happened and be grateful. I feel good that I made up for this in so many other ways. 

For example I took him for ice-cream for his birthday last year and watched the sail boats on the ocean with him and my Mom. He especially loved my fish broth and chicken soup I made for him when he was sick. I remember his smile and look of approval. I remember it now and it brings a smile to my face. 

I was just showing my Mom some pictures we took in Christmases and Ole Year's gone by and him opening his Christmas gifts in 2013 and she began to smile. My promise is to print a few more keepsakes so we would always remember the good times.

So today Friday is vastly different from Monday. I cry no more for a new day is here and I know my joy has come. Tonight we have some ice-cream for you Dad and remember the good times.

Cheers~